Dear Tea

Dear tea,

have i ever told u how much i love u?

what u mean to me?

u have been there wid me always when i needed u.

when i m down u give me a high.

when its raining n i m missing him..u were there wid me.

when i dint eat for few days..u were there to make me feel better.

most of my fights wid my brother ..were coz of u..

we used to fight for u.

ur aroma is unforgettable.

i love to have you when i m listening to songs..n feeling senti : (

when i m lonely...all by myself.

when i reach home..first thing i ask for is YOU.

when i m tired of crying i wash my face n grab a cup of u.

when its cold morning of winter i sip u in my bed.

u taste best in d morning. my first cup of tea..to start my day.

always faithful to u

me ; )

Do U Knw D Secret Yet??

Generally i dont have ne particular reason to tell why i read this book? i actually connected wid dis book.

sumtime back i read dis book called "The Secret" from Rhonda Byrne.. When I started reading it i really dint have ne idea tht its gonna leave a impact on me... seriously!

but.. as i was turning the pages gradually i started feeling better about life.. slowly i was looking at things positively : ) may be for some time but i felt better n hopeful..

i was restless and emotionally drained ( for sum reason) .. but thn i remembered about The Secret..

" To acquire love .. fill yourself up with it until u become a magnet."

think what you want..think it is happening already what u want...

"create ur day in advance by thinking d way u want it to go,and u will create ur life intentionally." it sounds so easy na? its not tht easy.. cuz fear grips u.. n u start telling urself >> wot if it doesn't happen like dis? now u r attracting to urself what u dont want to happen.. hmm being positive is not tht easy dude! but dont give up..go on.. think what u want..it will come to u soon..very soon. .. my faith got stronger whn it actually happened wht i was waiting for..

yess i was brimming wid joy!!

The Secret claims tht we can have,do or be anything we want. how? by using our force>> force of our thoughts.. ur power is ur thoughts, so stay aware.

this book reminds me of one of my favourite books >> The Alchemist.

" WHEN U TRULY WANT SOMETHING,THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE WILL CONSPIRE TO HELP YOU ACHIEVE IT."

I just marvelled at d simplicity of the story. the way it is told is amazing.

" life is really generous to those who pursue their destiny." never stop dreaming but dont forget to wake up n make them come true..see them come true..

if u focus completely on what u want, u will definitely get it.. this book can transform ur thought process totally. there's nothing so unique in dis book.. we all have heared these things sumwhr from sumone... but what matters here is >> how beautifully its described.

it might get you d change u r looking for. its a self-confidence booster i feel.

think good about urself..love urself..respect urself...pamper urself : ) and thn see how people do the same to you.

is it true? may be it is! wots d harm in trying? atleast give it try guys. go on..

i personally believe that its possible thats y i gifted this book to someone special ;-*

Law Of True Love

law of true love: you shall love unconditionally; when the biggest condition is your having no condition(s). you will love but not expect >>> LOVE, affection, acknowledgement of your being there, accidental rub of hands or whatever, appreciation, eye contact full of intimacy, erotic touches n talks, discussions on everything or anything...n so on...

But...!! what if you have it all? and still you cant expect it even when you are actually having it? now thats a difficult one.. thats what i am going through.. he has loved me so much in all ways... has given me ultimate pleasure no one can give... spoken his heart out to me, no matter whatever it is.. family, business, flings, feelings, desires, love, sacc ^ everything... but even though i am in a state that i cant ask for it.. ( craving n starving for it..)

no one's fault actually... this is the way it is...

is it possible to love "unconditionally" anyway? God knows!!

coz we know we should not expect but we expect.. and when we dont get it ..we get hurt.. we sulk.. but our innermost soul was always well aware about it.. it knocked up again n again.. but "love is not only blind.. its deaf also ;-* "

thats the spice of life.. if we get everything we want who will call it life??

there's a popular saying >>> " Never love someone who becomes a priority for you when you are just a choice for them. " well my case is not related to this saying..

but we dont choose to fall in love.. if we choose its not love.. love just happens itself.. well now dont get confused between love, infatuation and attraction its all different..

Love hurts .. if its certain..why cant we stop to love? we just cant..

move on.. where? how? and why?

boy! who loved me..touched me..been with me all those years...i spent nights talking to him over the phone doing strange n exciting things .. felt him..his arm around my waist.. his gentle hug.. a squeez.. consider himself lucky that i am with him..love me tenderly..love me firmly.. his teeth on my tounge.. when he hides his possasiveness.. when he whispers that he loves me.. when he first time kissed me.. spent his pocket money on me... borrowed his friend's bike to take me for a joy ride...waited for me everytime... when we did first time...n then dont know how many times...whom i thought of all the time...whom i think of all the time...who has been honest to me..whatever it is...how can i forget it all n move on? i wanna live with it...i wanna cherish it..relish it .. all my life.. no matter what.

i wanna crawl to him as if i am a baby.. meant to love..

but then >>> remember the law of true love??

a long way to go..

blogging... its about self-expression.. so m just gonna write whatever i feel n realize... as a woman.. in today's so called modern world.. modern society..

INDIA.. as long as i know its a democratic country.. just to say.. actually its not..( in so many ways) "sad but true."

whats happening all around us ..with us ..in different states ..different excuses..since forever... we are all well aware about it.. why go back to d old times? lets look at d current time.. as a woman can we take our personal freedom for granted? just like men? its a dream..far from reality.. situation is worse in villages..but in metro cities also its not great either..

what happened in manglore pub we all know it..its a shame!!

people who are responsible for dis..are well connected enough to escape the law.. today its about going to a pub n tomorrow it can be about wearing western outfits..n then about laughing..dancing n so on.. on the name of indian tradition they are doing it.. but do they know the indian tradition that well?? atleast i dont think so..

if i am roaming around with my boyfriend.. which i love to..i see people bothering about us more than themselves.. whats wrong wid them? why cant they mind their own business?

we are advised to carry pepper spray..learn karate.. but why should we be in a situation like dis at all? why cant we walk late night in d streets?? as long as i am not breaking any law.. people who are actually breaking d law are walking free n proud as if they deserve a medal for there bravery..

what a democracy !

Nothing Can Beat A First Date ; )

date: 18-11-02

venue: odeon, c.p

what should i wear? which colour will look good on me? this one? no-no this one... finally i picked up black ( known as fool proof ) i think its perfect....hmmm m ready to gooooooo... exxxxxcited??obviously!

damn! auto-auto... yaar in sabko wahan jane main problem kya hai? ek hi answer... bohot duuuuuurrr hai madam... finally i got into a auto.. he was driving okay but it was very slow for me...i think m gonna be late for sure..my first 'date' of my entire life...n look at me i am terribely late... but finally i reached late hi sahi..~~ wow!! here he is wwooww...

i saw his first glimpse ; ) cuuuuuuutie.... very close to my imagination... green jacket...sweet smile on his face..my love...coming towards me... he was sure its me..

he told me he saw my hands first....nnnnn...he liked 'em :-*

he really waited long for me... ( ye to shuruaat hai) hehehe.. "jeena sirf mere liye" our first movie.. show shuru hone main abhi time hai..lets just roam around..we were talking n blushing at d same time..we were both bachhas yaar.. suddenly he asked me to call his name..he just wanted to reassure i am d same gurl he speaks to.. i called his name~ ***** n he was smiling .. so sweet!! i was still trying to believe i am actually meeting him... we got gifts for each other..we exchanged 'em..lovely! i love them..my most precious ones..

everytime i looked at him he was looking at me wid a smile...i was too nervous n excited at d same time.. dont know what he is thinking of me...he liked me?..say sumthing na.. hmmm movie is over... we r just chilling n roaming on d roads.. nice sunny day.. it was going smooth n suddenly we were surrounded with hijras ...damn!! they just started...wahh! kya jodi..tumahri jodi bane rahe...n so on....i was scared..he just handled d situation somehow.. wot a relief. being a boy he ought to do that..hahahaha.. i just took advantedge ;-* i was a bit scared of my big brother as it was possible that he sees me there with him..he is not cool about it : ( specially if its me.. but nothing happened like dat.. i was happy.

it was a blush-blush meeting..for both of us..

kaise samjhaon tumhe...

mera pahla pahla pyaar hai ye..

i went back home with a smiling face..tickling heart.. too many questions in my mind.. what he thinks about me? he likes me? list goes on n on..

i was desperate to reach home just dying to speak to him.. what will he say? hmm its his call i know... yesssssss he liked me... he said nice things about me : ) n i was just too relaxed n happy to know that.. somebody's views about me dint matter so much before.. but now it does.. dis is a different world now.. i told him how much i liked him how close he was to my imagination.. how much i am absorbed in his thoughts day n night..he has become my DESIRE...my DREAM..my GUY.. life is beautiful..

perfect stranger

It was an usual evening of 21st august 2002 ...

my cousin came to my house..we were just chatting about things...movies,friends,school,internet..then she told me that she doesnt have an e-mail id yet...n dont even know how to chat on messenger...

hhmmm..even i was not so regular with surfing or chatting...but i dint show that to her...i said letz go to a cyber cafe then... (yup i dint have net @ home that time ; ) ..
so here it is..i logged in from my yahoo id... entered delhi global chat room.... msg windows here n there...msgs were just popping up one after another... most of them just hogged up like they never chatted wid a gurl before...ahh..finally we chose one guy wid a decent id. he just said a simple hi...n we began to chat.. unknown of the fact that life will never be same again...
after that normal a/s/l session we chatted for a while .. when we were about to leave he dropped his fon no on d chatting window...
i was returning home wid my cousin... she asked will u call him? it was an prompt answer - naah.. u mad ? but sumwhr in my heart i was planning to call him...may be i wanted to talk to him when i m alone... ;p
as soon as we reached she said m dialing his no...i just smiled in confusion... he said Hello! owwwwwwww my god..... i just loved his voice...
he was sounding adorable n cute n soooooo on... we talked for lil time.. n his door bell rang..
he said papa aa gaye i will talk to u later.. n hanged up : (
hhmm confusion confusion... why m feeling so restless ya? it was just a guy i chatted wid...
why m behaving like a weirdo******** god knows!!
neways....
now its me alone... who has to take the initiative to contact... ofcourse i dint give him my fon no yet.... though i liked him the way he was sounding....ummm.. nice guy!! i told myself : )
i went to the cyber cafe next day same time.... to find him ... to chat with him.. to know him better... but... i was not tht smart after all..as i showed it to my cousin... i dint know about adding friends in messenger... i was wondering how to find him in so many ids there in chat room... how dumb i was...
n suddenly a msg window popped up....oww here he is... my smile was touching my eyes.....i was so happpppppy as if i have found a fortune..... $$$$$$$********
i started calling him everyday....
the cafe owner was glad to find a religious customer...widout missing a day i used to chat wid him... till the time he is not online i used to read his old mails....again...again...n again....
finally i gave him my contact no too... my greed to listen to him more often ; )
it was all so magical.....that i dint notice that i am madly in love with him... wow!

i never used to feel like dis before... never used to dream wid wide open eyes... never used to think about someone alllllll d time...never used to be so crazzy..
n how about him??
this question to myself was enough to skip a heart beat...
does he loves me too?
what if he dsnt? nooooooooooo!!!
he does...he does....
he likes me i know....
his mails r indicating that...i culd sense when he is smiling cutely...he used to like d way i used to call his name... i dint know wht was so unusual in tht....but i was tickled in my heart ~
days!!

his flirty chat just woooooed me... it was him all d time on my mind..

eager to hear tht long fon ring trrrrrrrring.... widout caller id i knew its his call.. hahaha

its november 2002 already ... third month... n we hvnt meet yet... m just after him to meet but he has just one thing to say ~ milenge-milenge dont worry.. ; )

arrre but when? aur kitna wait yaar? dont u wanna meet me? dont wanna see me?

i just cant wait anymore.....

dying to see u now...............

finally one fine day~~~ he AGREED : )